Take a look at the title of this blog

.... and tell me what you are expecting to read about when you visit this page. Presumably, you're going to read about sports and betting on them. Right? One would think so. Those of you who don't know me personally might have even been tricked into thinking there was "Sharp" information in here the first time you stumbled upon this space. This is a sports and gambling themed blog. Sure, there may be a mock or two thrown in for the occasional giggle, but ultimately I'm here to give my thoughts on sports and vent about all of my unlucky (See: bad) bets.

Imagine my surprise on Saturday when Ed, who is supposedly one of my biggest fans, told me that he considered my latest entry to be "Garbage" and "Long-Winded" and that I spent too much time talking about sports. Later that day, when I saw Jeff and casually thanked him for reading, he coldly informed me that "I really don't read it as much as you think I do." Ouch. (Blogger's note: Obviously, I know that he was lying. But he said it with a bunch of people around so it still hurt.) Overhearing this conversation, Sean mocked Jeff for reading my blog and dismissed blogging as a waste of time. Even Graham told me he hadn't read it in a while, even though he can check it from anywhere at any time on his phone. Making matters worse is the fact that Blog SuperFan #1 Chris Bennett is in Africa and not here to offer encouragement or ideas for future blogs. My confidence hit rock bottom when Ed told me that the blog looked like my Dad had written it. I'm pretty sure that doesn't make sense.... but still - ouch. Bloggers have feelings too, bro.

You have to understand that a blogger is like an athlete. Trash talk can throw us off our game. When I was younger and had a shred of athletic ability, I used to play a lot of sports and heard my share of trash talk. One time I was playing basketball and I got fouled very late in a close game. While I was standing on the sidelines during a timeout, waiting to attempt the free throws, I heard a kid say about me, "Look at his face. He's going to choke." It was hard for me to pretend I didn't hear that but I managed to make a respectable 1 out of 2 from the stripe. During my senior year of high school, our rugby team went on a tour of Europe, playing various high school teams in Ireland and England. The first game of our tour took place in Dublin, Ireland, and the entire school (K-12) crowded around the field to watch us play. As I was standing there waiting for the opening kickoff, a group of Irish kids that were maybe 13-14 years old called out to me, trying to get me to look over at them: "Hey, America! Hey, America!" When I finally turned in their direction, they got really excited and one kid said to me, "Say something! Hey America, say something for us!" Confused, I looked at their group and replied, "Like what?" The kids all erupted in laughter at my American "Accent." Five seconds later the game kicked off and for the next hour I was very aware of how stupid I sounded. (And about 5 minutes later I became very aware of how good Irish kids were at rugby. Yikes.) My confidence was shaken and I was off my game.

My point is that it was hard for me to blog the last few days with my confidence at an all-time low. (And it took me three long-winded paragraphs to get to that point. Wow. Perhaps I should bring Ed on as editor....) Let's jump ahead to the blurgbs, which will have very little to do with sports today, per Ed's request:

* Apparently people want less of my thoughts on sports and gambling, and more about my parents. I have no idea why but I'll try to oblige. The problem is that with me in Vegas and my sister in Europe, I have no fresh material coming in. When she is home, my sister will call me at least 2-3 times per week and start the conversation by saying, "You're never going to believe what Mom/Dad did....," even though I always believe it because I know how crazy they both are. My sister will be back from Europe on July 10th, and I'll start relaying her phone calls as soon as possible....

* Since my sister and I graduated from high school and both moved out, there are not many times where me, my brother, and sister are all together. Even when I come home, they are both off doing their own thing and I'm taking stupid trips to places like Atlanta City, New Jersey or Morgantown, West Virginia. Whenever all three of us are home, we end sitting together to catch up, maybe for an hour or two. I'll tell them a few things about Vegas, my sister will tell some boring story about life in Pittsburgh or her sorority, and my brother will talk about what it's like being 18, still getting an allowance because he doesn't have a job, and having season tickets to the Redskins, Hoyas, and Nationals. This is my favorite part of any trip home, not because I really care about what they have to say, but because these conversations inevitably lead to us swapping crazy stories about our parents. I always assumed that we were the only ones who found our own parents so amusing, but judging by the reaction from my readers, everyone does and I'll start sharing them all with you guys. I was keeping this blog hidden from my Mom because it frequently mentions long nights drinking and/or going to strip clubs, but now I have to keep it a secret so that she doesn't read all my stories about her and start her own blog telling embarassing stories about me....

* I have a future bet on the Tigers to win the World Series and knowing that Ross is a big Tigers fan and has the same bet, I sent him a text last night pointing out that the Tigers were now 12-3 over their last 15 games. Ross replied that he didn't want to say anything, for fear of "Jinxing" his team. I found this strange, as all I had said was that they were 12-3 over their last 15 games. That's just a statement of fact, so how can it be a jinx? Are they going to go back and play those 15 games again now and not have as good of a record? If I say the Celtics won the NBA Finals, would I be jinxing them? It already happened. It's over. They won it already, just like the Tigers already won 12 of their last 15 games. I don't believe in jinxes whatsoever and apparently I have no understanding of how they work. Someone please explain to me what constitutes a jinx. I would appreciate it. And for the record, I don't even believe that the stuff Chad says is "Jinxing" teams. I just think he's an idiot and anything he says has to be wrong....

* Golf analyst Johnny Miller recently said that he thought Rocco Mediate looked like he should be cleaning Tiger Woods' pool, not taking him to sudden death holes at the U.S. Open. Upon hearing this, Metcalf joke that the comment didn't make sense to him because white people don't clean pools, only Mexicans do. Dude.... I feel like Matt is a few more of these comments away from coming to blows with Rodney or Graham, while Ed stands there excitedly yelling "Race War!"....

* Speaking of our young senior supervisor, he was apparently taking shots at me while I was gone, for my somewhat lengthy vacation. What's that all about, cuz? I can go on a 2 week vacation. Hell, I could be gone for 2 months. It doesn't matter. I don't actually do any work. I just sit there for 8 hours, with a pad of paper next to me, taking notes for future blogs. I thought everyone already knew that. Every now and then, I pull a Costanza and act like I'm real mad and stressed out, so that people think I am doing tons of work, when really I'm taking naps under the desk. (Yeah, nobody tell Kornegay or Ed about any of this, please....) Anyways, when I tried to confront Metcalf about what he had said, I was informed that he was already gone for the day. Big surprise. I'm going to get in this kid's face soon enough, assuming that I actually catch him between vacations....

* Have you heard about Marcus Dixon, who is trying to make an NFL roster this summer as an undrafted free agent? Apparently, he was a stud recruit in high school but was convicted of statutory rape. At the time, Dixon was 18 and the girl was 15. It should also be pointed out that Dixon is black and the girl is white and this all took place in Georgia, so there is literally no chance that he got a fair trial. During the trial, it was also brought up that Dixon had been suspended twice from his school for "sexual activity," once for exposing himself in a classroom and again for inappropriately touching a 14-year-old girl. Dixon did his time and is now a free man and with his football talents, he should be fine. I'll give you 3 guesses as to which team recently signed him to a 3-year/$1.1M deal....

* Austin (aka Luckstin) Bhushan is at the College World Series in Omaha right now. Does anyone know if any of the sports book heads in town went to West Virginia University? This kid can do whatever he wants just because he went to same college as Kornegay. He texted me last night from Omaha to inform me that he had been drinking, and that there were lots of pretty co-eds in the crowd, so he might need me to send bail money. I told him he should try to make a move on a UNC girl, seeing as how she would most likely be depressed and vulnerable following their elimination at the hands of Fresno St. (Okay, I actually didn't tell him that. I really wanted to. I just didn't want to type it all out in a text message. And I definitely wasn't going to call him and have one of those awkward phone conversations where the person you're talking to is in a big crowd, and he/she is speaking up but you still can't really understand them, so all you want to do is get off the phone. What did you say, Ed? Long-winded? Dude.... go read Hoffman's blog, then.) Anyways, Austin and his crew of flunkies will be at the game tonight, so if you have a sister or a female cousin that goes to Georgia or Fresno St, I would recommend giving them a call and telling them to be careful....


Okay, I'll wrap this thing up before Ed falls asleep at his desk. If you want to read succinct thoughts from a good writer, go read Rick Reilly. He's outstanding. I'm just making stupid jokes to keep myself entertained in between losing bets. And I'm a little short on material right now. I haven't seen Jorgen in weeks.

I'll be funnier next time, I promise.


Monday's Trivia Question: Legendary comedian George Carlin passed away last night at the age of 71. How many of his "Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television," can YOU name?

** Thursday's Answer: Gary Player.


Forgive me if I'm off my game today. Not only was my confidence rattled at work, I hung out with Hoffman on Saturday night. Let's just say that by the time I was going to bed, Jorgen was already arguing with the kids at work. I don't know how I get roped into these things. I think the Hoff is just too wild for me. That reminds me: Still no takers on that wing man thing? Really? Anyone? Please....?

I have no picks today. I'll blog later in the week about the Euro 2008 semi-finals and a bet I have on Russia to win the tournament. I got them at 100-1 in a wager I placed on July 9th, 2006. But I'll talk more about that later.

Check out those new pictures. You're welcome.

Thanks for reading. I've written enough garbage for one day. I'm going to go get ready for work. Should be a slow night but the Nationals are playing the Angels giving me at least one opportunity to....




Enjoy the game.