This may be a good time

.... to start stockpiling canned goods as Chad Jackson won another "Lock" yesterday in blowout fashion on the Boston Celtics. I don't think I want to live in a world where that guy wins consistently. Next thing you know Austin's going to have something negative to say about a Colorado sports team, Chris Graham's going to put in a 40 hour work week, Hoffman's going to take a harmless joke in stride, and a Lakers opponent will get a fair shake from the refs. (Scratch that last one. That's just taking it too far. When that happens I really will start stockpiling canned goods.)

No need to beat around the bush today, let's just jump ahead to the blurgbs:

* Do the Pistons really have that much confidence in themselves that they feel comfortable mailing in Game 3 of the Eastern Conference Finals? They don't want to leave themselves in a position where they have to beat the Celtics, the refs, and the NBA in Game 7 at Boston Garden. I wouldn't put it past David Stern to pay some deranged fan to throw a cup of beer at Rasheed Wallace in an effort to bait him into coming into the stands to fight. The Pistons are in trouble.

* Based on what I saw during the NHL Playoff(s), I thought the Penguins were the best team in hockey. Apparently I know nothing about hockey and shouldn't talk about it in this space ever again. Of course, I really don't know anything about gambling (or sports) and look at the name of this blog....

* The only topic I'm truly qualified to write about is Jorgen and I'm sick of it. Even though making fun of Jorgen is the only genre I've mastered, I don't want to be labeled a "Jorgen writer" any more than I want to be labeled a "Comic writer" or a "Sports writer." I can do it all. That's right - I'm a "Blog writer."

* Don't you think Jorgen secretly loves the attention he's getting from this blog? Think about it - the quiet, All-American farm boy from Iowa, who all his life has been an ancillary character in most people's lives. Now all of a sudden he's the star of stars in a blog that's read by as many as 8 people, as many as 3 times per week! Only in America.

* Like most of you, I've been watching a lot of the NBA Playoffs on TNT and I've seen more commercials for The Bill Engvall Show than I can count. Also like most of you, I have never bothered to watch it - you know, because it looks so stupid. However, unlike most of you, I took the initiative to check online and see how old the actress who plays Engvall's daughter is. She's uh.... she's too young.

* I've also seen a lot of commercials for Tyler Perry's House of Payne. I ignored them.

* For the record - It may not be my favorite show but King of the Hill makes me laugh harder than any other.

* Speaking of TV, now that The Sopranos and the The Wire are both over, what exactly is HBO bringing to the table? Curb Your Enthusiasm only has a new season every 2 years and Entourage has been pretty weak the last couple seasons. Please don't make me resort to watching Flight of the Conchords again. I think that the New Zealand sense of humor may be too sophisticated for me.

* In Sports Illustrated this week, they named the top high school sports program in each state, including the District of Columbia. Not surprisingly, my high school -Gonzaga College High School - was named the best high school sports program in D.C. Maybe that's why it was so hard for me to get playing time. Or maybe I just sucked....

* The option "Define Rape" was the runaway winner of my Kobe Bryant poll. Nobody voted for "Yes" - Not even Mike O. So not only was Kobe found not guilty by a jury of his peers in court, he's now been found not guilty by a jury of (mostly) haters on my blog. Time to let this one go - the guy didn't do it. Sorry, Kobe.

* Pac Man Jones should really be in prison right now so he'll be in the closest thing available this fall - Valley Ranch, the headquarters of the Dallas Cowboys. If the Cowboys are really "America's Team" does that mean we are a country of gun-toting, dollar-bill-raining, pom-pom-waving, winking-at-no-one-imparticular, thugs/showboats. I don't care for that moniker. Someone make a fair price on "Will Mike Vick End Up Playing for the Dallas Cowboys Before 2010." You have my number, Chris.


The majority of baseball games started before I woke up, so Sunday's card is rather light:

Spurs

White Sox


I also wouldn't mind seeing the #20 car in Victory lane tonight at Lowe's Motor Speedway. Although, at this point I'd be satisfied with anyone other than Kyle Busch winning.

Sunday's Trivia Question - In the classic bowling movie Kingpin, what state is Woody Harrelson's ill-fated character Roy Munson from?

** Saturday's Answer - can't wait to hear d.w. say.... " boogity, boogity, boogity, lets go racing boys."


Personally, I can't wait to hear D.W. say "Boogity, Boogity, Boogity" this afternoon. Should be a great race. I'm going to go watch Those Nasty Nats try to blow a lead against the Brewers. You should really vote in my poll before you head off to....




Enjoy the game.